The Devil's Handshake

I made a deal with the devil where I would torment the living in
exchange for special privileges when I am in hell. We were about to
shake hands when my arm fell off so I don't know if that deal is
still good. My lover descended into hell to bring me back to the
land of the living but was told not to look at me until we were back
on earth. We were walking barefoot through the river Styx when I cut
my toe on a rock so I stopped. Honeybuns turned and Cerberus the
three-headed dog bit his nose off. We managed to escape Charon the
rabid rower and so now I, the gimped girl, live with my noseless
lover and don't know what will become of me when I see the devil
again. Maybe if I give my DNA-demented kid a devil's haircut I'll
placate the great one.

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